Category Archives: Poem

Night Terror

Sleep sets in I arrive in my nightly scene 

cast of haze inside this place

quite an eerie thing

This is where the darkness waits again, fix your mind this is in your brain

Sense of dread within, as I walk through bloodstain 

I pray for ease of this strain 

Lift the chain

How long must I do this in vein 

The occasional horror I am trapped 

as if I’ve been grabbed by a force unseen, I can’t scream in my dream 

Always silent it would seem

I can’t breathe, I’ve been seized 

Something has a hold on me

A phantom it must be

I can’t move, I want to be free

Sliding down the wall I collapse trying to yell

hhhellp! HHhelp!! 

It comes out 

HELP ME!!!

Winter Dance

Autumn moon’s a flutter, it is winter time

He drinks wine from her lips, as he spills his lies

The heat of their passion fills the room,

They’ve known each other for a time, yet they are strangers

Hiding themselves like children in a game of hide and seek 

Oblivious to the fact the other knowns their hidden places

Clinging tightly to that which they think they love, always with the lingering fear of losing their grip

Pulling and undulating, sliding on sweat, striving to make the other never forget

A breath and a whisper of naughty things said, as they behave badly tangled in the bed

A powerful clinch and embrace, ecstasy written all over their face

Lust’s sweet release and primitive peace

Lying into rest after passions success 

Fingers through hair they sweep, kisses so sweet and then falling asleep.

Groundhog Day 

Go to sleep another day in vein Tried to drown my sorrows and all that pain

Four drinks in and I didn’t feel the same 

As a matter of fact I couldn’t feel a thing

Something happens at around twelve drinks in

When I’m all alone and feel like I don’t have a friend 

I turn the bottle up again thinking I should do myself in

I get angry and destroy everything around

I drank enough whisky to put an average man down

Why am I here again I say with my head low 

What happened to me I do not know

I don’t understand how it’s all turned to shit

It’s everything, I just don’t get it

Everything is spinning I need to lay down 

This is as good as any this spot on the ground

My head is humming buzzing in my ears

It’s the same thing again, I’ve been doing for years

My nightly prayer was to let it end

So I didn’t have to wake up like Groundhog Day and do it again

Waking in the morning angry at the world

Wife says what’s wrong with you, I say I woke up, what a pearl

I’m sick of this stuff 

She was the one who had it rough

When it hurt bad enough I finally stopped 

I remember praying a lot

I started going to meetings and just didn’t drink 

I started listening to people I didn’t even know 

Because they were sober and I had no place to go

Someone told me I should be proud of myself for being a jerk

It was the culmination of my entire life’s work 

I should be happy and give myself a pat on the back 

He asked if that made me angry, I wanted to give him a smack 

I said yes

He said, that’s because It’s true you’re really a mess

The good news is you never have to feel this way again

All you have to do is change everything my friend

I have to admit I didn’t know what he meant then

He said what are you willing to do to get sober again

I’ll do anything, I want it to be over

Since then I’ve made many less mistakes when I started over

By doing whatever it takes, willingness to change has set me free

I had to trust somebody else so that I could see my drinking wasn’t the problem, the problem was me.

I had a living hell of a life that I created 

I let go and was emancipated 

God will set you free if you trust in him and do the work

Test the theory and see if it’s true begin to pray and it will happen for you, even I stopped being a jerk!
Recovered Alcoholic, Jason

The Clock is Ticking

image
From Cycle to Spiral
Time stamps a seal on all the things we do and feel somethings seem unreal
no matter how nice Nothing in life occurs twice Not for any price
All that we’ve been we will never be again
rules of time we cannot bend
Once we learn things are not the same It’s futile to live a life full of blame or shame
Forgive and let live it’s time for a change Take some time and rearrange
Your perspective will be clear if you let go of fear
Life is a vapor in the mist You can’t hold on to your first kiss Only sit back and reminisce
It’s how we move ahead that shows our worth if we stay behind we’re eventually lowered beneath the earth
Jump and shout or be quiet and still Whatever you do get your fill
We only have one life make it a thrill!
Jason

Word Therapy

This is a place that is totally me,
I have set myself completely free,
The blog posts within tell where I’ve been,
Deep feelings flow on a page,
Some veiled, cryptic, or full of rage,
Positive push and good tidings for you,
Healing remedies of thoughts I have used,
Confused emotions that I’ve lived through,
In this space I’m all over the place,
You never know what you might find
The ramblings of my mood a reflection of my mind,
All authentic completely exposed to you,
In this place I can be true,
I put myself out there to help others like me,
To know they’re not alone and that they can be free,
If what you read is not appealing, read a different post you might find it healing
Some of what I write is sad,
I may seem a little mad,
Most of the time I’m very glad,
Take what you can and leave the rest behind what I write won’t cost you a dime
I hope to never waste your time,
Be blessed, that’s my rhyme,
Jason

The Masters Stroke

The Master artists stroke of the wind
painting with cloud 
highlighting with sunset in a vast array of color, from his unique pallet atop waters edge 
still and clear like a plate glass mirror 
as if to complement the artists work

 

showing a clear copy in itself 

doubling the beauty that has been created
yet my mortal eye catches but a glimpse
the smallest grain of sand a remarkable sculpture itself
the wonders I miss are okay with me, I will cherish the sight as I see. 

Happy Birthday Jordan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s your birthday again, oh, how long it has been.

I start to think of you and a happy thought across my mind runs,

Shortly after fatigue comes
My arms go weak
And my body goes numb
My heart hollowed and I’m overcome
My memories of you don’t bring me tears
It’s separation from you and the fading memories I fear
I remember your sarcasm and witticism I struggle to remember your laugh and your many mannerisms
I’m scared and afraid that it all might fade
This morning I started out, it was like dragging an anchor, weight on my whole body it was hard to move
Please pray for me son to The Lord our God?
Some days are so very hard
I keep going it’s just something I do
I want you to know I’m missing you.
I’m giving love like I never have before,
I’m sad because I can’t see you anymore
I hope you’re proud of me now, it was because of you, I wanted to learn how
I’ll do as much good as I can and be the man and Dad you new I could be to the end
pray for my soul so I can see you again and thank you for believing in me Jordan

Stare

I could stare at you for a thousand years, and that wouldn’t be enough.

I need to have your love, smell your smell, taste your taste, and touch your touch.

I can’t hold my stare, I must close my eyes to go to sleep. This gorgeous view I struggle to keep.

I want to gaze at your glow while you rest

gently brushing your hair away from your face as it drags across your chest.

I hope to fill my mind with visions of you, that I might see you dancing in my dreams where I’ll dancing too.

Oh, the fullness of love I enjoy,

beholding your heavenly silhouette in the moonlight,

if only my sleeping dream could be simply this sight.

My eyes fall without my knowing, only to dream of you with wind in your hair softly blowing.

You look at me as you’re running,

with passion and excitement in your eyes

as you leap into my arms nearly knocking me down, I spin you around and lay you to the ground.

Laughing together, in love and awe, brushing your cheekbone with my thumb as my hand gently caresses your jaw,
across your ear as my fingers roll under your silky dark hair

Then to the back of your neck like this was always our fate

I move close watching you wait,

as if you beckoned my kiss, I hesitate

Only to tease and breathe you in.

Our lips press together once again.

Releasing you as I get up from the ground
helping you up what treasure I’ve found

we go in hand in hand and you ask how my day has been.

I awake and there you are as beautiful as ever but a little too far.

I slide over and draw you in good morning Kitten it’s time to get up again.

I wrote this as I thought of my hearts desire!
I love you Kitten

For those of you who read this. I believe the secret to marriage and love is to seek God first restoring yourself to your proper order and balance seeking his guidance loving yourself, you become more love able.
Then wanting the person you loves happiness more than your own, giving without expectation of return.
If you expect nothing, everything that comes after is a bonus and your not left with resentments.

By changing ourselves we change the world, have a fantastic Friday

Good Night

Writing in starlight as I shoot for the moon

Smell the lilac in bloom and feel the evening dew

I listen to the cricket song playing in the night

See the fruit bats taking flight

Headlights pass deceiving my eye changing shadow as they drive by

Quiet and stillness take hold, a bit muggy but not cold

looking at a bog shaped like a bowl, it’s filled with fog muck and mire

I’m so calm, I yawn with a stretch and then I retire

Goodnight

You’re my Waking Fantasy

Wondrous, gorgeous fortune, you make me rich beyond compare

Your dark hair shimmers magically like water in moonlight causing me to stare

Your eyes like burning embers set my heart ablaze
Whenever your around I hear the song of our love as it plays

Your beauty delights me your intellect insights me your hotness excites me

I love taking you into all of my senses, oh, to hear your voice not even a sentence.

A whisper with a glance makes my heart dance

Your scent fills me, and makes my blood boiling hot it is so intense

My love for you is so immense.

You give me strength, bring me balance, and tame the hungry lion in me

your soul must have been designed for this specifically

I look forward to seizing your being with all the virility, passion, and love of my heart

intertwining our bodies like celestial stars, colliding like demolition derby cars

I will be like the wind and you like the trees, I will wrap around you blow through you, moving your limbs and rustling your leaves.

When we finish in our moment of bliss I say I love you and give you a kiss